Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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