She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Did we literally take a cab across the street
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
