Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
