Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
