You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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