My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
