I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
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