this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
