Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
