They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Rumble strips road head = magical
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
