You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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