I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
