I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
