How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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