Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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