so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
