You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I can't trust your balls anymore.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
