beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
