Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
