Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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