How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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