and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
