Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
