stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
