maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
