He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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