ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
be right there i have to get my cape
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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