they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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