Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Acid is not a monday night drug
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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