i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I party with great urgency now.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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