the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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