she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
