During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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