You're so nebulous sometimes
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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