If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Randomize
