I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
