her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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