Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She bit a glass in half.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
