hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
