So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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