I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Green mimosas i think yes
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
