I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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