i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize