i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
