The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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