I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
