Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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