no, he came in my armpit
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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