I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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