Don't you send me to vm
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
